Friendship

So I have been wondering all day about fake friendships. I have a friendship with someone that I think is really fake. She spends all of her time with other people but claims to love being with me. I just want to stop pretending. If you don't particularly care for me, then just move on. Why fake it? I hate being patronized! To me actions speak louder than words. You can say you value someone's friendship but you have to put time into it.
It is hard to talk about these things with my husband. Guys just don't get it. I just think that women have this inner thing where we long for close relationships with our friends. Maybe I am messed up because I have always longed for a close relationship with my mom and she is just too weird for that. So my husband thinks I should just deal with it and get on with life. Which is a guy thing. I can't help the longing in my heart. I envy women who have intimate relationships with their moms. You know, cup of tea, heart to heart talks. I keep praying that God will send me someone like that. So far He hasn't.
Anyway, this friend who disappointed me made it seem like she was the mother I had been looking for. But it has been such a huge disappointment to me. I really loved her as if she was my mother, but I felt more rejection from her than I did my own mother.
I have to put this behind me and just keep praying that God will send me the real deal.
Let me just say that writing about it has been very theraputic for me. I like the idea that this will be floating around out there, and maybe someone will read this and maybe no one will but who cares. The possibilities are fun to think about.